I hear the drums echoing tonight
But she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation
Shes coming in 12:30 flight
The moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation
I stopped an old man along the way
Hoping to find some long forgotten words or ancient melodies
He turned to me as if to say, hurry boy, its waiting there for you
Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never have
The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless longing for some solitary company
I know that I must do whats right
Sure as kilimanjaro rises like olympus above the serengeti
I seek to cure whats deep inside, frightened of this thing that Ive become
Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in africa,
I bless the rains down in africa
I bless the rains down in africa,
I bless the rains down in africa
I bless the rains down in africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never have
It's the rainy season in Rwanda, something I dreaded because EVERY season seems like the rainy season in Ruhengeri. But it hasn't got me down -this term has gotten off to a fantastic start.
I left school in April feeling exhausted, not exhausted and fulfilled. I was teaching four rather advanced classes in subjects I haven't studied since high school. I tried to be both teacher and mentor, both laboratory instructor and camp counselor. Each week, I prepared seven different experiments and taught 24 hours of class. And somehow I fooled myself into thinking I could take on pet projects to boot. I remember writing in my journal while proctoring an exam (just before I got terribly ill and missed 5 days of the exam period...) "I'm really doing nothing here but hurting myself. By only teaching in the laboratory, I'm neither showing the teachers how to manipulate the equipment, nor practicing conversational English with the students, nor am I using my talents to the best of my abilities. At best, each week I'm just getting by."
During our holiday, though, I made some second term resolutions: I will spend more time with the students outside of the classroom. I will teach fewer subjects. I will spend more time on things I know. I will find a way to make my work sustainable... Oh. And I will start to cook for myself.
It's a tall order to live up to those resolutions, and three weeks in, I'm not terribly sure I'll reach them in this term. But I've been making a start and that has made all the difference. I tend to look at the two terms like this: the first term, I was the passenger enjoying (and sometimes pulling all-nighters to appreciate) the scenery. This term, I'm driving... sort of.
This term, in addition to cooking for myself (how I've missed vegetables!), I've learned to put my foot down. After a talk with our very understanding Academic Master, I'm still teaching 24 hours, but this term, I only prepare three lessons a week, plus a English course for our teachers. I'm working on starting our school's first science fair (any suggestions?) and am helping to produce our student's very first school newspaper. I'm compiling a list of tested experiments for the teachers to use next year, and for the first time in these almost five months, I'm working on things that I know more about than organic chemistry. And let's face it, there is no end to the things I know more about than organic chemistry.
I was told that after my month-three slump would be the month-four love-affair, and it's true. I can't imagine leaving now. I rearranged my room. I finally put up my mosquito net and have put away all traces of my temporary residence - my suitcase is now serving as a table under some beautiful wax cloth, my $1.50 travel alarm clock is replaced on my kitchen table with my radio. I'm shopping in the market and negotiating in broken, but passable, Kinyarwanda. And I've stopped counting daily the number of days until Term Two ends. When I was making the schedule for the science fair I kept thinking, "What?! That's it?! Only 2 and 1/2 months til August?!"
I know, thanks to the "Cultural Adjustment Timeline" we were given in our orientation, that this euphoria is not likely to last. But when it fades, I think I'll be in a stronger, better position than I was before. Every one wants to feel like their making a difference, particularly when you've come so far from home, but I've realized that the best way to actually do so, is to do what I know. And while I'm doing it, I'm, in a way, "doing things I never have", asserting who I am and being confident enough to know that that is all I need.
Be yourself :)
Much Love,
jen
